My Goals For Writing

  • In my next essay, use more text evidence, and relate back to the story more.
  • Next time I free write, write a fictional story.
  • Use 3 words from the class list on moodle in each piece.
  • In my next piece correctly use a semicolon.
  • Next time I write, try to write something other than a poem.

Friday, May 14, 2010

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

This is just a cool quote about birthdays! It made me laugh! =)

Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.

–Larry Lorenzoni-



Author's Note: Its my moms birthday, so I wrote this about birthdays, and moms.


Happy Birthday

Have you noticed

You get all attention
       love
On your birthday

Your birthday
You’re the main character


We never remember
To show the correct thanks
          Honor
Throughout the year

Before-after
You’re a side character

A birthday is an annual reminder
To honor your life
A major part in mine


Your support
Your attention
Your time
Without,
we wouldn’t have


Have you noticed
We wouldn’t get places
         Stuck
Going nowhere

Your birthday
We are happy to be stuck


We never remember
We signed up for your team
        First
Before all else


Practice-game
Coaching us through
Every game you set it, I’m the champion
To let me shine high

When you’re the real hero

You start it
You set it up
You get it going
so it,
plays out for me


The love, attention
I always get
Bounces back, for you
For you to be in
The spotlight
That you should always be in

3 comments:

  1. I especially enjoyed the second poem. As a poem, it worked the best. The words you decided to isolate are interesting, and worked for you. The theme is sweet, of course, and those sort of poems can be the most difficult to write for fear of being banal, or trite. You avoid that trap really successfully. Well done. Keep writing poetry, as you have a real talent for it.

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  2. I really like it. It's really unique and what you're saying is really true to. I also like how you isolated a couple words and how they went so well with the lines before and after them.

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  3. That was a very good poem, I liked the message in it and liked the format you placed it in. You are an accomplished poet.

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